I know it's been a while since I posted anything. A testament to life...it's always there and it always seems to be trying to sprint past you. Lately I've been struggling with stuff. Looking for a summer job has been a big one, especially for a university student who has tuition to pay soon. I have no idea how many resumes I've sent out, but I know it's quite a few. And I have Christian references and volunteer work and extracurricular activities on my resume. I started looking in February and still don't have anything. I was told that it may be all that "Christian stuff" which made companies avoid me.
I struggled a lot as to whether I should lessen the amount of Christian content in order to get a job. I felt like I was somehow disowning God if I did that. Or I'd be lying by omission. I just couldn't feel right about making those changes. I thought that if no job was my persecution for Christ, it could be worse. I should be thankful that I have it so good. Then I started worrying about whether I was just being a snobby Christian who was "holier than thou" or being self-righteous about my resume. Was I too proud?
Talking to some other people who had had the same issue with Christian stuff on their resumes, they suggested that I rewrite it in a way that didn't emphasize the Christianity but more the skills I learned. So now I have two resumes. One that has been de-Christianized and then my normal one. I am still uneasy about having made those changes. I am trying to rely on God to give me a job and if I get one, it will be entirely his doing. I've tried for 4 months to get a job on my own and it hasn't worked. I am trying to give it to God and see where he wants me to be.
I have been writing this post over the last hour whilst doing other things and just checking my e-mail now, I have a job! And it came from one of the resumes I had sent out that has the "Christian stuff" on it. So to anyone wondering if it is worth holding out and trusting God no matter what, I say, "Proverbs 3:5-6". I was trusting God but not with all my heart and I wasn't acknowledging him in ALL my ways. Change of a heart attitude can do wonders. So keep the faith, no matter who tells you otherwise or discourages you. God is the only one that matters. Do I regret making the changes to my resume? No, but neither am I proud of them. I let myself get discouraged and losing trust. However, God promised not to give you more than you can handle. I got to a point where I was giving up and God came to lift me up again.
In Bible study at my church, one of the big things we discuss is how much of God and how much of me. To that I say, give it your all. We are such small creatures in the grand scheme of things that our all doesn't amount to much and therefore God is the one who really does it all. Like a 0.00001% to a 99.9999999%. We have the honour of participating, but really, I have no doubt God to do it without us. So yeah, we get tired and sometimes those close to us are no help at all and actually discourage us. Cling to God at all times and have patience. Check your attitude and be fully reliant on God. Having the faith of a child will get you called naive but God says the kingdom of Heaven belongs to the little children. Take heart and keep the faith.
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